Too demented to receive Communion?

Possibly.

Last Sunday, I briefly chatted with our priest about Communion…. the holy rite that makes us Catholics, well Catholic. Or to be more precise, the fact that we believe the bread and wine actually transforms (transubstantiated) into the body and blood of the big J-C.

My mother used to be what they call, a Eucharistic Minister—she would give Communion to churchgoers and the sick. Now, she’s sick and no one comes to our house. I’ve called about this. I guess I could try harder. I’ve sort of given up on this… mostly because she still takes Communion on Sundays. The problem, however, is that she not only takes Communions, she holds up the line trying to talk (actually, she rambles—LA FRUTA, LA FRUTA, MI ESPOSO, DESPIERTA AMERICA) to her boyfriend the priest……………….. then, making matters slightly worse, she chugs the wine—and backwashes—and refuses to give back the chalice (so I have to yank it out of her hands)……………. she likes the blood of christ…. it’s Berringer, White Zin. Nice legs.

This has caused some commotion and so when I talked to our priest about this in hopes of making the process less loud and messy, he told me that we should start “weaning” her off Communion. Apparently, one of the prerequisites of receiving Holy Communion is that you understand what you are doing, that you are consuming the body and blood of Jesus Christ. She obviously doesn’t, and therefore should not receive the most sacred of rituals within our church.

This is frustrating. My mom LOVES to get her Communion—despite not having the most pure motives (she wants to chat up her priest and she likes wine)……………….. but is it really up to mortal men to decide whether she can consume the body and blood?

{Long siiiiiiiiiiiiggggggghhhhhh, eye roll}

Seriously. I mean, I don’t have the deepest connection to Our Father, but I think God will cut my mother some slack in this situation (Preemptive apology: I am very sorry Dear God that my mom chews your son up and then chugs his blood, often spilling it on herself), especially since he is the one who made my mom sick—if you believe “that there’s one all-powerful Force controlling everything.”

Some quick Google searches on the subject, and the reviews are mixed.

One person on a message board called it “inappropriate,” another said that if the individual knows that the host is “special,” which I think my mom does, then it’s OK.

For me, I want her to have Communion because my mom was (and still is in her own way) one the most devout women I’ve ever encountered. I used to think her love for God was stronger than her love for me…………………..

So, for me, as her only daughter (who tried to get ex-communicated to avoid going to catechism class—it didn’t work—and now recites the prayers in Spanish so she can follow along with me—I intend to de-raise a good Catholic mother), all I want is for her to be able to receive the body and blood as she’s always done. I won’t fight the Church on the matter and I suppose we’ll see how things go……….. he wants to slowly limit her by just giving her the host (no wine)………………….

Holy Communion gives her joy and she’s often said that it makes her feel better……………………. the placebo effect of Christ.