My Demented Mom

5 million Americans suffer from Dementia. My mom is one of them. A site for young adult caregivers struggling and coping with "the long goodbye."

I have a message for my mother’s friends, family and acquaintances: She’s still alive. My mother’s heart still beats. Though she might not be able to talk to you, walk with you, or share a laugh with you, she’s still here. She’s still alive. If you spend any amount of time with her, you’ll quickly […]

A fantastically touching interview worth watching about early-onset Alzheimer’s disease. Award-winning CBS News Correspondent Barry Petersen talks about his book, Jan’s Story: Love lost to the long goodbye of Alzheimer’s, based on his journey with his wife Jan. Petersen talks about the changes in his wife’s personality, which started as early as 40, the reaction of family […]

My mom isn’t yelling much. This is a new development. It wasn’t long ago that she would howl when I would walk into her room. “Shhhhh. It’s OK. Shhhhh. I’m here. Shhhhh.”  She’d turn her head, look at me with this terribly anguished, almost twisted face, and yell. “Shhhhhhh. I love you. Shhhhhhhh.” I would […]

November is National Alzheimer’s Disease Awareness Month and National Family Caregivers Month. In the United States alone, there are nearly 15 million Alzheimer’s and dementia caregivers. Click here and join us in honoring them by sharing a personal tribute message.   >>Flickr pic by Mrs Logic

Dear hospice and nursing home (names of providers removed because I have enough problems, frankly), Thank you for making late/end stage dementia even more awful by not coordinating your care of my mom, by failing to communicate with me, by making me feel like I’m making poor decisions on her behalf, by one day telling […]

………………………….Can make for a pretty complicated relationship. Actually, I just saw the comedy Friends With Benefits last night and wanted to share because the movie touches on Alzheimer’s disease…………. Now, most times, I take issue with how news, movies and TV shows portray dementia……………… they typically avoid the grotesque, that is, the disease is wrapped up in a […]

The running joke about me is that I see the glass as half empty………… The reason I choose to view most every situation from this angle is to avoid disappointment. It’s a method that’s served me well………….. especially when it comes to my family. Of course, I would never describe myself as a pessimist. That’s […]

I had so many noble ideas for this week’s post….. I was feeling good. I started thinking about how this — life — was some sort of test, a means of proving one’s ability to persevere and not succumb to the easy-outs; because by staying the course, we’ll somehow achieve spiritual bonus points. I was arrogant, I suppose…….. […]

Dear Demi Moore (and every other well-to-do celebrity suffering from “exhaustion”), I wanted to write you this note to express my sadness at your current condition. I’ve always enjoyed your work (even the stuff that was panned, because it was you) and admired your strength — you came from nothing and created a wondrous life […]

My grandpa passed away over a week ago. This, following everything with my mom…………………….. he was 94. We knew his life was coming to an end, but to have it happen so soon after we placed my mom, and in a way lost my mom…………………. I know my mom is in a much better environment, […]

I do not look like my mother. But ask anyone else and they would disagree with me. Oh my God! You look exactly like her, they say…. I’ve tried, but I have never seen my mother in the mirror……………….. And I have many mirrors. Truthfully, I’ve always fancied myself my father’s daughter……………… both in appearance and […]

Keeping mom at home is becoming increasingly difficult and stressful. I’ve found a home that I think will be a good fit — as good as they get. It has a solid reputation both locally and nationally. Still, it’s a home. Or more accurately, a floor. A floor filled with people who sit in wheelchairs […]

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